Vaalnest Boutique Hotel is my castle and here I reign supreme. My favourite pastime is bird watching – of course – and I will let you know that 240 bird species have been identified in my immaculately kept designer’s garden. (Yep yep, Solomon am I with many concubines.) A bird lover’s paradise... wink wink. For a wily old bird like me – Heaven! Visit me and book a guided bird-walk. You will never be the same again. Just be sure to bring your camera. Unfortunately, touching is prohibited but you may feast your eyes...
I do enjoy the occasional game of golf near here but have to dodge flying balls the whole time. A while ago a stray ball almost beheaded me and since then I decided to declare the golf course a no-fly zone for birds. I prefer to catch a ride on the shoulder of a caddy. I do love the greens and will occasionally pause to nibble away. It’s soooo good for keeping a bird regular.
Ladies, you’re welcome to come and feel the bump on my head – it’s still here. Please do croon in my ear when you do your thing.
For those of you who are birds of another kind (vultures), I give you the Paintball Park. I myself do not adventurously venture into the warzone, thank you, but prefer to spend some quality (and safe) time in my underground bunker having a relaxing massage. I am King Reginald Casper the Third and rumour already has it that my great-great-great gogo had an encounter with a certain flying specimen named Casper the Ghost, hence my name.
Naturally, taking my royal bloodline into account, I do not want to encourage such idol and slanderous gossip, and therefore I stay clear of the flying paintballs. I do not want to be romantically approached by a peacock. Trust me. (...and I do NOT want to have any descendant of mine be called Prince Reginald Casper Peacock the sixth. Ugh!)
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